These tweets are so specific and ridiculous there almost seems to be no good reason for them to exist. Yes, they fill a void, but that void would have been better off being empty.

Let this be a reminder that just because you feel the urge to tweet doesn't mean you necessarily should tweet. Maybe just whisper your thought to yourself instead.

Hopefully you can find some small amount of enjoyment from these weird little jokes, and if you can't then may we suggest watching a giant primate play the saxophone.

Whatever you do, please don't go on Twitter. Don't go on Facebook either. Just go to the nearest patch of grass and start shoveling handfuls of dirt into your mouth until you feel good about yourself.

Or just click here for more fun stuff.